Seems like narcissism is all the rage these days, doesn’t it? Every relationship problem is because one person is a narcissist. Every unpleasant person we encounter is now a narcissist.

But why is that? Are we really living in a time when self-obsession is peaking? Or is it simply a combination of pop psychology combined with an increased awareness making us notice these behaviors more?

Let’s explore if narcissism is actually increasing or if it just seems that way.

Role of social media

Social media platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook are built on the idea of sharing our life – often in carefully and strategically curated snapshots that highlight only our best moments. The instant gratification of likes and positive comments creates a destructive feedback loop that encourages self-promotion.

When every post is a chance to be validated by hundreds or thousands of people, it’s not hard to see how focusing on personal image can get out of control.

shift in cultural values

Nowadays society places a huge emphasis on individualism and personal success. We’re constantly bombarded with messages that tell us to “be unique,” “stand out,” and “make your mark.” Yeah, these ideas can inspire creativity and ambition, but they also encourage a kind of self-centeredness that borders on narcissism.

If your self-worth is closely tied to external achievements and how you present yourself to the world, no wonder why it seems so many prioritize their own image over genuine connection with others.

Instant Gratification

Today, every thing is instant gratification. So of course everyone is going to be impatient and even impulsive. Many people are less tolerant of things that are hard, time-consuming, or difficult to obtain because so much of what we want is available in just one click.

This kind of instant gratification fuels impulsivity and entitlement – the two core elements of narcissism. 

Parenting styles

Parenting styles have also evolved over the years and some believe that modern approaches contribute to narcissistic traits. Parents today strive to boost their children’s self-esteem by constantly affirming their value and uniqueness. While this is definitely important for a child’s development, it can easily lead to an inflated sense of self if not balanced with lessons on empathy and humility. The challenge is to help children grow into confident individuals who also understand the importance of caring about others.

Economic and social pressures

It’s a dog eat dog world out there and the drive to succeed often pushes people to focus intensely on their own goals and achievements. In the workplace, traits like assertiveness and self-promotion are rewarded. While ambition is undoubtedly important, it sometimes blurs the line between healthy self-confidence and narcissism. If success today is often measured by how well we promote ourselves, it’s easy to see how one might start valuing image over substance.

Increased awareness

It’s also worth mentioning that awareness of narcissistic behaviors has grown. Psychologists and sociologists seem to be paying more attention to how our environment shapes our interactions, and there’s been a massive surge in research on the topic. With more research and public discourse, it might seem like narcissism is on the rise – even if it’s just getting more recognition than before – kind of like how we might notice a particular trend in fashion after it’s been highlighted by influential figures. Increased attention doesn’t necessarily mean the phenomenon is new or growing exponentially; sometimes, it just means that we’re beginning to have a conversation about it.

Despite these influences, it’s important to remember that not everyone is caught up in the narcissistic culture. Many people still value deep, meaningful connections and prefer genuine interactions over the curated images we often see online. In fact, there’s a growing counter-movement that emphasizes mindfulness, empathy, and authenticity. People are increasingly recognizing the downsides of constantly seeking validation and are taking steps to cultivate more balanced lives. From digital detoxes to community-building activities, there are plenty of ways to counteract the pressures that might lead to narcissistic behaviors.

So, is narcissism really on the rise?

The answer isn’t entirely straightforward. While modern technology, cultural shifts, and even economic pressures might encourage behaviors that seem narcissistic, it’s also possible that our heightened awareness is making these behaviors more visible. What’s clear is that our society is evolving, and with that evolution comes a new set of challenges and opportunities for personal growth.

James Killian, LPC is the Principal Therapist & Owner of Arcadian Counseling in Greater New Haven, CT where they specialize in helping over-thinkers, high achievers, and perfectionists reduce stress, increase fulfillment and enhance performance so they can move From Surviving To Thriving.